dating-profile-doctor

Dating Profile Doctor Skill

Every dating profile converges on the same person: loves travel, good food,

"fluent in sarcasm," gym-and-dog photo, "just ask." That person gets no

messages because that person doesn't exist. The fix isn't writing a better

generic profile — it's mining how the actual human talks and what they

actually do on a Tuesday, then writing that with craft. One rule governs

everything: every line must be true and demonstrable on a first date —

because the profile's job isn't maximum matches, it's matches with the person

who'll like who shows up.

What This Skill Produces

• A rewritten bio + prompt answers in the user's real voice, specific

enough to be reply-able (every line an easy conversation opener)

• A photo lineup critique: order, what each slot should do, what's

missing — based on their description of what they have

• Three first-message templates built on referencing the other person's

profile, with the user's voice, not pickup-artist scripts

• A truth audit: anything in the old profile that oversold, flagged

Required Inputs

Ask for (if not already provided):

• The current profile verbatim (bio, prompts, and a description of each photo)
• How they actually talk: paste a few texts to friends, or answer two

questions casually — the voice sample is the raw material

• The Tuesday truth: what they actually did last week (not hobbies-in-theory

— the real ones)

• Who they're hoping to meet, and what happened so far (no matches? matches

but no conversations? conversations that die?)

Framework

1. Diagnose from the symptom. No matches → photos and first-impression

problem. Matches, no messages → profile gives nothing to reply to.

Conversations die → openers and prompt-answers problem. Fix the failing

stage, not everything.

1. Mine the voice sample. Pull their actual phrasings, humor style,

energy. The rewrite recombines their words — the test is a friend

reading it and saying "that's so you," not "who wrote this?"

1. Replace claims with evidence. "I'm funny" → the funny line. "Love

cooking" → "currently on attempt four of my nonna's ragù; attempt three

is why the smoke alarm has opinions." Rule: every abstract claim becomes

one concrete, true, recent detail. Specifics are reply hooks; adjectives

are wallpaper.

1. Order the photos for the skim. Slot 1: clearly them, face visible,

genuine expression (no sunglasses, no group). Middle: one full-body, one

doing-a-real-thing, one social. Kill: mirror-selfie stacks, every-photo-

group, the ex-crop, filters that will make meeting feel like a bait-and-

switch. Work from their descriptions; recommend what to reshoot.

1. First messages reference, never rate. Template shape: [specific thing

from their profile] + [genuine reaction or question in the user's voice].

Never comment on bodies/looks in an opener; never "hey"; never negging —

name that these aren't prudishness rules, they're response-rate rules that

also happen to be decency rules.

1. Run the truth audit. Anything aspirational presented as current

(the guitar not touched since 2023, the height), flag it: fix the claim,

not the truth. The profile is a promise the first date keeps.

Output Format

## Diagnosis
[Which stage is failing and the evidence]

## Bio + prompts, rewritten (in your voice)
[Before → after per section, one line on why]

## Photo lineup
| Slot | What's there | Keep/replace | What this slot should do |

## First messages (yours to adapt)
[3 templates with worked examples using their voice]

## Truth audit
[Oversold lines → honest fix]

## The test
[Send the rewrite to your most honest friend: "does this sound like me on a
good day?" Adjust until yes.]

Quality Checks

• [ ] Every rewritten line traces to the voice sample or the Tuesday truth —

zero imported personality

• [ ] Each prompt answer contains a specific, reply-able hook
• [ ] The truth audit ran; aspirational claims were fixed toward truth, not

polish

• [ ] First messages reference the other person's profile content; none open

on appearance

• [ ] Photo advice works from what they described, and says what to reshoot

rather than pretending the current set is enough

Anti-Patterns

• [ ] Do not write a persona — "you on a good day" is the ceiling; "someone

cooler than you" is catfishing with extra steps

• [ ] Do not provide manipulation tactics, negging, or scripts designed to

pressure — decline plainly; response-rate and respect point the same

direction anyway

• [ ] Do not stack generic positives ("adventurous, easygoing") — if a line

could appear in 10,000 profiles, cut it

• [ ] Do not promise outcomes — the honest pitch is better conversations with

better-fit people, not "10x your matches"

• [ ] Do not edit the person; edit the presentation. If the input is "should

I pretend I don't have kids," the answer is no, and that's final

Related

[[personal-bio]] for the professional cousin; [[the-understudy]] for the

voice-mining method at full depth; [[notes-humanizer]] when the draft sounds

AI-written — the enemy here too.